Ah the weekend.
Relax. Watch some sports. Make a sandwich. Give yourself a Coffee Enema.
Yes, you read it correctly.
A Coffee Enema.
Something not likely part of your next Vente Latte order – at least we hope not! – but important for your health just the same.
Now you might imagine doing a coffee enema as a complex procedure. Actually it’s easier than you would think, and more effective than you can imagine. Look at the end of the post for instructions on the simple procedure.
You might also be asking, “Why would I do such a thing?”. Great question.
Coffee has an effect on the liver which causes the liver cells to expel toxins. As you likely know, the liver is a major organ that helps us to expel toxins from our body. It does this expelling constantly and so at times it can become a bit clogged up. This especially is true if our general diet and lifestyle choices add to the toxins the liver normally needs to deal with on a regular basis.
By taking in coffee as an enema, you take advantage of some unique plumbing around your digestive system. ALL of the veins draining the stomach, small bowel and colon come together to form the portal vein, which goes directly to the liver. Thus the liver filters all of the blood flow returning from your digestive system, and filters anything that has been absorbed from your gut. So, all the things from the coffee go directly to your liver.
There is a big bolus of coffee to your liver cells, but little or none makes it past your liver to your general circulation. You might think you could achieve the same thing by drinking the coffee – but trust me – the enema approach works much better and is easier on your system.
Something crucial to remember: You MUST use organic coffee. And don’t use decaf. When you decaffeinate coffee using any method you not only remove the caffeine – you remove many of the beneficial antioxidants in the coffee. So, use regular organic coffee for this procedure.
The instructions call for two separate infusions, one after another. Over time we found that much of the benefit comes with the second bolus you put in. So just do both parts.
The volumes used are small. Don’t worry if what you put in doesn’t all come back out, as much of it is absorbed.
The great thing about the whole procedure? It’s relatively inexpensive. The red rubber enema bags that your grandma used are still sold and work well. When we looked, our local drugstore sold them for about $5.99.
Grandma would be proud!
Below the directions will walk you through the basic process. Make sure that you have a bit of time to do this. Best not to try this a half hour before going out on a date or important job interview. Come to think of it – Saturday might just be the right day!
Basic Coffee Enema Protocol
1) Use ORGANIC coffee – regular, not decaf and purified water.
2) Brown coffee filters are best (white ones have chemicals in them)
3) Use coffee maker water measurement for 8 cups of coffee
4) Use 8 teaspoons of coffee
5) Make coffee, and then allow to cool to luke-warm temperature
6) Split the coffee in half (about 4 cups each) to allow for 2 enemas per session. The first enema cleans the bowel and the second one clears toxins from the liver.
1) Lift toilet seat lid
2) Place a waterproof pad and towel on the floor or bed.
Prepare Enema Bucket or Bag:
1) Attach the hose (the end with no small side opening) to the bottom of the bucket or bag. Be sure the hose clamp is SHUT.
2) Fill bucket or bag with first half of warm coffee solution and place/hang 2-3 feet above the body. (Some people lie in the tub while taking the enema)
3) Apply lubricating jelly if necessary to end of hose.
4) Move pinch clamp to about 4 inches from delivery end.
5) Open clamp to clear air from hose, then insert gently into rectum.
6) Lie on your left side and relax for 10 minutes, then lie on right side.
7) With tube still inserted in rectum, move to commode and release.
8) Repeat with second half of coffee. When finished, remove hose, wash all parts of apparatus in hot soapy water and let dry thoroughly.
1) If you are having trouble retaining the enema, you can do it while sitting on the toilet.
2) Enemas are most effective in the evening after a bowel movement. If you notice an effect from the caffeine when doing the enema, try using only 1/2 the amount of coffee, or do the enemas in the morning.
3) COFFEE ENEMAS LEACH MINERALS FROM THE BODY. YOU MUST TAKE A HIGH QUALITY MINERAL SUPPLEMENT WHEN DOING COFFEE ENEMAS. (for example, Vitality Boost)
Your heart pumps all of your blood through the liver every 4 minutes. As your body absorbs the coffee directly into the blood stream, it is filtered out by the liver and stays in the liver absorbing toxins from the blood. Eventually, the liver will squeeze out all the bile. You may not see this gooey yellow stuff for up to an hour after you have finished the enema.
At first, you may only be able to hold the solution for a minute or two. It takes a few sessions to learn to relax and hold the solution in. This is normal. As you learn to relax, retention time improves.
On this therapy, patients sometimes develop flu-like symptoms. The coffee enemas help ‘detox’ – to enhance liver function and the process of excretion of metabolic wastes, which eliminates detox symptoms such as low-grade fevers, headaches, aches & pains and rashes. If this is happening, use one of the drainage and detox remedies recommended by your clinician.
OK. Let us know how you did and any questions that came up. Leave a comment below. Here’s to your health!